So as most of you know, every year in several United States cities across our nation, there is an annual Saint Patrick’s Day parade on March 17th.  This tradition in Massachusetts goes as far back as the year 1737, and its main purpose is to celebrate the Irish culture and to pay homage to our brave veterans.  In Massachusetts we have a council called, The South Boston Allied War Veterans Council, and they are the group which is responsible for setting the standards of procedure for various groups who seek to join the parade.   They are the ultimate “powers” that be, and they have the power to deny or approve a group’s application to join and march in the parade. 

This year the MassEquality.org group represented LGBT Veterans in the hopes that a group of 20 veterans would be allowed to march in this past weekend’s parade.   As you surely know the application was denied and several business pulled out their sponsorship of the parade, and even Boston’s Mayor Walsh sat out on the parade as promised.  The Council claimed that they would allow the group to march in the parade, however, they would not allow them to display any flags which relayed their sexual orientation.   They claimed that they could not display such items due to the fact that it contradicted their “code of conduct”.    My question is this, Why is this your “code of conduct”? 

In the Press Release below, issued on March 6th 2014,  it is mentioned that they denied the application for the following reasons: “the good of the parade”, “this is an historic event”, “to celebrate the love of friends and family”,  and “to insure the enjoyment and public safety of our spectators”.

Let’s circle back to that.  Shall we?  Oddly, everyone was all aroused with their panties in a twist by the fact that Heineken, Sam Adams and Guiness pulled sponsorship from the parade.   Really, are you butt fucking serious?  No pun intended ::ahem:: I digress.   Let’s look at the facts here, the parade is sponsored by local and national sponsors as well as private citizens.   Also, for those of you that live in the area, well how do I put it?  Boston, yeah….it’s like wicked gay,  kid.

These results are from a Gallup Political Survey. These results are based on responses to the question, “Do you, personally, identify as lesbian, gay, bisexual, or transgender?” included in 206,186 Gallup Daily tracking interviews conducted between June 1 and Dec. 30, 2012. This is the largest single study of the distribution of the LGBT population in the U.S. on record, and the first time a study has had large enough sample sizes to provide estimates of the LGBT population by state.

The 6th highest on the list, people.  Hmm….. Let’s really mull this one over.  This council receives it donations/sponsorship from local businesses where these gay people shop,  frequent and live.  Then this council publicly announces that they aren’t allowing LGBT veterans to march in their parade because they aren’t a part of their “family” and “history”.   I’m sorry, this is a serious question but are every single one of you fucking retarded?   No shit they are going to pull sponsorship, this is about business too.  Let’s not be fooled. 

You know it’s funny,  I’m certain I may lose some friends who read this, because I laughed at the ones on my social media news feeds who were angered by LGBT Veterans and their demands to march in the parade.   After I sat back and read some of these reports and researched a bit further,  I thought who wants to march with a bunch of drunk old bigoted fucks anyway?   But then that’s me, it shouldn’t mean they be denied due to another person’s bigotry.  

Some of my friends updated their statuses on social networks with such ideas: “What’s the point of allowing them to march in the parade?  I’m straight and you don’t see me wanting to march in the parade.”    Two reasons:  In all likelihood, you lack adversity in any form, especially if you are white, and if you are not a veteran a special fuck you is in store for you.  These people were veterans and they could not wear a rainbow or the like on their shirt, in fear that it may “offend someone”.  give.me.a.fucking.break.   Are we not more progressive than this?

The other concern, of course, was safety…. but if I were a betting gal, and I am on occasion, if the police were able to keep the LGBT picketers subdued they could reciprocate in kind for the idiotic fundamentalist types who may have shown up.   Just tossing that out there, and also how about our odds?  Remember that poll I told you about?  I’d say there’s a chance they would have had more support than a lack thereof.   Also, that parade would have been FABULOUS!

On the Official St. Patrick’s Day Parade Website (as seen below), the very first home page is their claim to fame for their “Historic Event”.  Well, lookie there a click-able button to bring up a page for all the best bars.  Neat!!  This is a surefire way not to ruin the INTEGRITY of an event.

Next on the list of usual “suspects”.  Religion.   What a fucking surprise..  As they wrote at the bottom of their letter,  “God Bless”, hence their reasoning is very suspect.  You know, I wouldn’t normally complain about this,but I’m getting real tired of people like that Phil Robertson from the Duck Dildo show, oops I mean Duck Dynasty show.   Those people who say: “Love the sinner, Hate the Sin.”   Getting real tired of your shit, Lucy.   Real tired.  You know,  I’m sure Jesus was a swell guy and for people who believe in his teachings that’s great for you,  I mean it.  Seriously,  Jesus hung out with lepers and healed them, which I’m sure that group was comprised of some very nice folk… but I’m staying as far away as possible from those creepy melting bastards.  So props to Jesus for being a far better person than I.

So how about that elephant in the room?   How do we square with this whole:  “love the sinner, hate the sin mentality”?   Let’s crack open that bible and take a look at a few areas of concern, shall we?  First up at bat, the real kill joy of the bunch:

Leviticus 18:22 :  King James Bible
Thou shalt not lie with mankind, as with womankind: it is abomination.

Well, how do we square with such things.   I have to say, I don’t rightly know.  But here’s a few other choice passages from scripture that Christians conveniently IGNORE.   My vote:  All Christians MUST strictly follow all passages/commandments from scripture for an entire YEAR then report back to us about how awesome being “saved” is.   Let’s begin with some of my favorites.  Shall we?

 

Leviticus 15:19-30 English Standard Version (ESV) – (essentially this passage outlines why a woman should not be touched while she is menstruating, and every thing she touches is unclean. Oh and if you touch her you have to bathe yourself till evening?  Uhh, I’m sorry but  what the fuck does that even mean?  Oh and btw where are we supposed to sleep if our husbands can’t sleep with us?)

Leviticus 15:19-30 “When a woman has a discharge, and the discharge in her body is blood, she shall be in her menstrual impurity for seven days, and whoever touches her shall be unclean until the evening. 20 And everything on which she lies during her menstrual impurity shall be unclean. Everything also on which she sits shall be unclean. 21 And whoever touches her bed shall wash his clothes and bathe himself in water and be unclean until the evening. 22 And whoever touches anything on which she sits shall wash his clothes and bathe himself in water and be unclean until the evening. 23 Whether it is the bed or anything on which she sits, when he touches it he shall be unclean until the evening. 24 And if any man lies with her and her menstrual impurity comes upon him, he shall be unclean seven days, and every bed on which he lies shall be unclean.

Or this one Leviticus 11:7 – I’m going to summarize, No pig, hence no bacon.  You wanted an invitation to the “no sinners” party.  You’re welcome.   No bacon for you for a year.  Have fun douchebags.

Leviticus 11:7 And the swine, though he divide the hoof, and be clovenfooted, yet he cheweth not the cud; he is unclean to you.

Next up: Leviticus 19:19 –  No more blended cloth for you… That’s right no “wool blends” or “cotton blends”, god forbid if you put on polyester!  Only the purest of cloth from now on.   Helloowww itchy balls and legs, also mini sized pants after only one wash…you’re soooo lucky.  Quick tip: Just dump fire ants in your britches now and cut to the chase. 

Leviticus 19:19 “You must obey all my decrees. “Do not mate two different kinds of animals. Do not plant your field with two different kinds of seed. Do not wear clothing woven from two different kinds of thread.”

The next story is interesting and because of it I researched various scholars on whether God “condones” infidelity, because all signs thus far have pointed me toward “No”.   Well shucks, that’s no fun at all.   Well according to scripture (Genesis 16:2), Abram could not conceive with his wife ,Sarai, so she suggested that he go sleep with Hagar (the maid), in order to have children.   Now from what I understand, God did not condone infidelity but according to scripture he approved of their decision because he respected what was “marital law” at the time.   Although I still can’t square with how Lamech just blatantly got away with taking two wives  Genesis 4:19 (¹⁹ And Lamech took two wives. The name of the one was Adah, and the name of the other Zillah)??  Poor bastard, you know those women were bitchy as shit.  Just look at the picture.  That picture totally says:  “I will cut you bitch, right after I rip out his hair.”

Along that same line of thought, here’s how fucking your neighbor or the maid would play out these days.   Go to the IVF clinic? Nah, just go shag the neighbor…. Go ahead, suggest it to your wife.  It’ll be fun.

Last but certainly not least, for all you ladies,  SHHHHH!  No wait, shout and praise hallelujah, but just do it quietly so as not to offend your husband.  Pfffffttttt!

1 Timothy 2:11-12

¹¹ Let a woman learn quietly with all submissiveness. ¹² I do not permit a woman to teach or to exercise authority over a man; rather, she is to remain quiet.

OHHHHH, NO HE DIDN’T!!!!

 

How about that parade, huh?  Not just for classy sophisticates like us anymore… enjoy.

Feel the culture seep into your pores. feel it.